Provide a feedback framework

Certainly! Here's a feedback framework based on the insights provided by executive coach Matt Mochary:

Receiving Feedback:

  1. Ask for It: Encourage your team to provide negative feedback, making it clear that it will not be punished but valued. Use specific questions like, "If you were CEO, what would you change?" or "What feedback are you afraid to give because you think it will hurt my feelings?"

  2. Acknowledge It: Confirm that you've heard and understood the feedback correctly by summarizing it and asking for confirmation.

  3. Appreciate It: Listen without interrupting or making excuses. Thank the team member for their input.

  4. Accept It: Declare whether you accept the feedback. If you do...

  5. Act on It: Co-create an action item to address the feedback, set a due date, and follow through. Publish the feedback and action item to the organization to demonstrate commitment to improvement.

Giving Feedback:

  1. Use Two-Way Communication: Preferably in person or via video call to gauge reactions and address any defensiveness or anger immediately.

  2. Affirm the Relationship: Always start by affirming the value of the relationship with positive statements about the person's contributions.

  3. Write It Down First: Prepare your critical feedback in writing to ensure clarity and completeness.

  4. Phase the Feedback: Start with verbal feedback, then progress to written feedback in shared documents, observing the person's reactions throughout.

  5. Avoid Asynchronous Feedback: Never share critical feedback asynchronously to avoid misunderstandings.

Types of Feedback:

  1. Relative Feedback: Provide confidence in what they are doing well and steps to improve, using "I like that you did..." and "I wish that you would do..." statements.

  2. Absolute Feedback: Regularly communicate where they stand on an absolute basis, using a rating system and clear statements about what was liked and what can be improved.

  3. Deep (Emotion-Based) Feedback: Offered during a more extended session, like an offsite, and includes expressing emotions, stating facts, and making requests.

Advanced Feedback:

  • Recognize your part in creating the situation by stating, "I helped create this situation by…" This encourages taking 100% responsibility.


  • Incorporate feedback into regular meetings and one-on-ones, asking for written feedback and sharing actions taken in response to that feedback.
  • Encourage peer feedback within the team, ensuring all members view feedback as a gift and not a source of shame.

Key Considerations:

  • Create a safe environment for feedback by proactively seeking it and treating it as a gift.
  • Be prepared to address emotional reactions, whether anger or tears, as part of the feedback process.
  • Use feedback to build trust, improve operations, and retain top talent.

This framework should guide both the giving and receiving of feedback, ensuring a culture of transparency, trust, and continuous improvement within an organization.